Apparently this issue was sent out incomplete and all wrong wrong wrong. It is with great embarrassment that I admit this supreme error and with my deepest remorse that I offer you my most sincerest apologies. The very last thing I ever want to do is waste your precious time with content that is below the Calamity standard—which, to be fair, isn’t very high to begin with; this, of course, makes it even worse when we fail to meet even that low and most base standard.
Here is the complete edition, with all the unnecessary and rather embarrassing placeholders removed and replaced with less embarrassing though equally unnecessary fluff; rather, fluff we hope will elevate your entertainment, misfortune, and displeasure.
Now then, what does it mean to recommend, to rate, to judge? Surely we don’t know; we here at the Calamity are quite uncouth in our approach to introducing new attractions and highlighting performers. But I’ll not rattle your ear off about it here. That’s what the links below are for! Let’s take a gander, shall we →
Well, as you are aware, Volume II begins next week, which has provided a nice little fortnight buffer as of the close of Volume I. During this time, not much construction has been going on aside from a few pieces produced as so much scaffolding for the new Volume, and whole fuck ton of reading. Books, such as The Invention of Murder by Judith Flanders and Supernatural Horror in Literature by H. P. Lovecraft, and magazines, in the realm of Weird Tales, are being consumed at an alarming rate, all in preparation for some of the backstage attractions we’ll be unveiling in the coming Volume.
Body Count is in progress, and the expectation is that this attraction will be opened well before the close of Volume II, so be on the lookout! And of course, Children of the Damned is being assembled in piecemeal—we’ll be sharing more on that venture as Volume II progresses. Stay tuned!
What’s new Backstage? No vampires at the moment, but if you stop in Tuesday, September 2, you’ll find part one of Edgar’s and Isabelle’s story in A Vampire’s Vengeance. Also, The Groundskeeper launches the Necropolitan Gazette, a weekly look at the otherworldly phenomenon arising after sundown in the Calamity’s Necropolis. You can catch the first issue on Monday, September 1.
In the meantime, make your way to the JEST exposition to better acquaint yourself with the Calamity’s new content rating system:
on sale now
A traveling merchant steps into a curious boutique before facing down a former opponent’s posse.
What do you think of the new design? Isn’t it splendid?! I certainly think so, even if I do say so myself. If you have opinions on the matter, please, do share them. I promise not to toss them out … right away. You may reply to this email directly or use any of the survey links below.
And with that, I do believe that is all we have for you today! I do hope you enjoyed acquainting yourself with the new JEST system, and have signed up to receive the Necropolitan Gazette in your inboxes! We such an incredible show planned for you beginning in September!
Please, for the love of all that is unholy and calamitous in this world, please let us know what you think of this content! The buttons below will each take you to a respective survey consisting of two to three questions. Your opinions will help shape the future of Backstage at the Calamity.