Welcome one and all to the inauguration of the Carnival of Calamity’s Backstage Pass, Volume II! I do hope you are as excited as I am, as we have spent countless hours, days, weeks, and months preparing this exceptional backstage experience for you.
Here you will find not one, but two attractions being erected before your very eyes! Bus Driver and A Vampire’s Vengeance will be released in serial, for your weekly displeasure. We’re also featuring attractions of old that have influenced such modern stories and tales to make your skin crawl, classic tales that are no less terrible now than they were when first published. For you cinema connoisseurs, we have film features! Well, we are featuring films, not producing them, just to be clear. And of course, The Groundskeeper debuts their own publication, a feature of the Necropolis of Notoriety, the Necropolitan Gazette!
This is all in celebration of our innate and lustful desire to feel deeply, to be terrified beyond imagining ,and experience the catharsis of resolution. Let’s get into it →
Before we dive into a record of what attractions were in active development this week, let me preface this by saying construction is messy.
There. Now that you are properly primed, this week was spent tearing up a whole lot of foundation to improve and expand upon what is already dreamed up. We simply could not continue over the existing foundations as they were, as this would create problems at a later time, and the last thing we want is for you, our highly esteemed guest, to fear for your actual life rather than vicariously fear for it.
Or, even worse, be disappointed in the attractions when they open.
So, let’s look at a neat little checklist and see who’s foundation has been ripped to shreds and rebuilt, and who still needs to be ripped apart:
🟢 Body Count
🔴 Last Resort
🔴 Rise of the Warlock Queen
🔴 The Groundskeeper
Children of the Damned:
🟢 CYB3RPVNKCVNT
🟡 Unholy Requiem
🟡 Irreverent Eulogy
🟡 Shrine of Radiance
🔴 Dark Father
🔴 The Archivist
As construction takes time, and the foundation takes longest, this is no small matter. As you can see, over a few weeks, only two project foundations have been completed, with three others begun and five waiting in the wings. However, there is some good news for those of you eagerly anticipating the opening of a new attraction!
Rise of the Warlock Queen may be getting fast tracked, as it is the closest to being completed and we might as well get the damn thing up and running already. In any case, we hope to have more green dots by the next edition.
And for those of you wondering, yes, The Groundskeeper will be run through the process of being overhauled, improved upon, and polished to a sheen before taking its permanent place in the Carnival! Though that seems a little confusing, doesn’t it, what with the Necropolis of Notoriety and all that? Don’t think too hard about it now, it will all be cleared up in the future!
The Groundskeeper lives! If you enjoyed the Groundskeeper’s story, subscribe to the Necropolitan Gazette to catch more of their misadventures:
The vampires have arrived! Or, well, THE vampire, at the moment. Come read all about the beginning of a modern vampire adventure in A Vampire’s Vengeance. There will be mystery. There will be intrigue. And of course the usual blood and violence of which vampires simply cannot do without.
Here we debut the running of a series on Classic Horror, where we will feature a new short story every single week. Come Backstage every Wednesday for your vintage hump day thrills.
Ah the cinema. Oral tradition and the written word had us imagining the horror in the theatre of the mind; as early as the late 19th century, we have brought that theatre out of mind and off the stage and onto the screen. In celebration of terror across many mediums, we’re bringing to you one (1) Calamitous film review every week. Stop by every Thursday evening to grab your weekend’s horror film itinerary—Calamity on Cinema. You’ll find a list of two to four films grouped for your maximum terror, along with a review of one of the films. This week, we feature Watcher:
on sale now
An unwary guest falls prey to the magic of a local artist. A short story by Mad Alex, only available on Apple Books. For now.
A new volume, a new story! Isn’t that wonderful? In true Backstage fashion, you will witness a story come to life, much like in the penny dreadfuls of nineteenth century Victorian London—one chapter at a time, in serial. In Volume I, we featured The Groundskeeper. If you have not yet wandered through that very … er, interesting story, you can do so here:
Moving right along, in this new edition, we follow the Bus Driver as they make a perilous journey across zombie-ridden wastes and through gang- and faction-infested territories to bring his passengers to their destinations safely.
… I mean, if “safely” can even be used in any meaningful context here. 👀
Unbeknownst to our dear protagonist, one of their passengers plays no small role in this story. But you’ll have front row seats to drama as it unfolds, so no need to further divulge important plot points!
Now, without further ado, let us join the Bus Driver as he is provided a tour of his recently renovated vessel …
"Let's give you the tour."
The lead engineer on the project walked the bus driver out of the office and into the giant hangar. Large metal vehicle frames and shells of busses littered the hangar floor. The engineer and the bus driver stepped over and around piles of parts and tools of varying size, creating a semblance of an obstacle course.
The two made their way to an open bay. Sitting just inside the open hydraulic door was a completed vehicle: a worked-over charter bus, with elevated seating for the passengers. Smooth steel plates ran the length of the bus on both sides, with only the top parts of the windows visible. The windows themselves were installed in such a way as to create a sheer surface along the entire side of the bus. The bus driver stepped close to the side and noticed a thin filmy substance spread over its entirety.
"Sides are smooth as silk, and the oil will make extra sure nothing attaches itself to the vehicle," said the engineer.
The bus driver nodded, rejoined the engineer, and the two made their way around the bus. On the front was mounted an excavator, one of those giant shovels you find affixed to the front of a construction loader or bulldozer. Behind it, the sheer face of the front of the bus was coated in oil as well, including the windshield. Built into the roof were two rotating platforms, each containing a seat and a railgun.
The world was no longer what it once was; new precautions needed to be taken to ensure survival from one destination to the next.
At a glance, there appeared to be nothing noteworthy beyond these details. The engineer approached the door and, looking over at the bus driver to see he was paying attention, tapped it at a marked point. The door, appearing solid, split down the middle and folded open, revealing a short series of steps to a giant strong box: the driver's cage. The engineer climbed the first step and swung the door open.
"You've got three inches of steel behind a thin sheet of titanium, in case there's a breach." The engineer shut the door and rapped on the plate of metal serving as a barrier to the passenger cabin. "Likewise for your guests. The titanium's there to help prevent the metal from corroding." She turned and drew the bus driver's attention to the windshield, tapping on the glass. "The windows are all bulletproof, lined with polycarbonate to compensate for the steel." She pounded her fist into the metal behind her. "This will help against most of the shit you might deal with if raiders cross your path."
The bus driver raised an eyebrow. The engineer shrugged.
"Nothing's bulletproof, though you'll be fine against everything but rockets and ordnance."
The engineer once again opened the driver's cage and planted herself firmly in the seat. She gestured to a handle just behind the steering wheel, below the dash.
"Step back a bit, please. A little further. A little ... right there's fine," and she yanked on the handle. The bus driver watched as long blades snapped out from the side of the bus, all along its length, at about the level of his navel.
"These go all the way around." She began pulling repeatedly on the handle. The handle, the bus driver noticed, returned to its position each time. Each tug created a ripple through the blades, causing them to shift back and forth with some measure of violence.
"In a swarm, your defenses are one, speed; two, these blades; and, in case of a breach, three, the steel." She turned the handle and it shot back into its original position. The bus driver watched as the blades snapped back into the steel, creating the illusion of a sheen surface, as if they weren't even there. "Hopefully the oil will be enough and you can pull away from a swarm if necessary."
The bus driver took a deep breath and let out a long exhale.
"We did our best," said the engineer. "It's up to you now."
Well, isn’t that almost stressful to consider? Oil, blades, and cages, oh my! How will our Bus Driver fare on his journey? There’s only one way, of course, to find out. You can read Part II here.
It’s here it’s here it’s here! Oh I am so pleased to finally release this edition. Thank you so very much for joining me on this journey and coming Backstage to experience first hand all we are building. If any of this stuck a chord with you, please share with your friends, family, neighbors, the group chat, your social media mutuals, and most importantly your pets—bats and cats are sure to get a thrill! Seriously, any bit of extra attention will be appreciated.
I bid you adieu until next edition!
Cordially,
Mad Alex
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